From Publishers Weekly: This isn't just one girl's story of sneaking drinks in junior high, creeping out for night-long keg parties in high school and binge-drinking weeknights and weekends through college—it's also a valuable cautionary tale. At 24 (her present age), Zailckas gave up drinking after a decade of getting drunk, having blackouts and experiencing brushes with comas, date rape and suicide. She weaves disturbing statistics (from Harvard School of Public Heath studies and elsewhere) into her memoir: most girls will have their first drink by age 12, and will have the experience of being drunk by 14; teenage girls drink as much as their male peers, but their bodies process it badly (they get drunk faster, stay drunk longer and are more likely to die of alcohol poisoning); and date rape and booze go hand-in-hand. Zailckas had alcohol poisoning at 16 after a night of downing shots at a party with friends, but having her stomach pumped in the emergency room and enduring a month of being grounded didn't check her desire to drink. Fraternity keg parties led to drunken sexual encounters not-quite-remembered; drinking began to replace intimacy. Alcohol defined Zailckas's adolescence and college years to such an extent that, as she tells it, she lacks the tools to be an adult: she's unsure how to maintain relationships and unclear about sex without an alcohol buzz. Zailckas is unsparingly insightful and acutely aware of what drinking can and does do to girls. She explains that while kids are taught that drugs are always dangerous, alcohol is perceived as an acceptable rite of passage. Her book is deeply moving, written in poetic, nuanced prose that never obscures the dangerous truths she seeks to reveal. (Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.)

My thoughts: I assume the author is trying to discourage young girls from drinking, but I don't know that she really succeeds. She is obviously still in denial about the truth of her alcohol-soaked life. Very early in the book she says that, while she abused alcohol for many years, she was never an alcoholic. I agree there is a difference, but the author then plows recklessly forward, offering up pages of evidence that point straight to serious alcoholism. The author drinks every day, for the sole purpose of getting as drunk as possible. She states that there are no photos from her college years where she is not holding a drink in her hands. She frequently skips class because of her drinking and cannot relate to people who don't drink; in fact, she has no friends who do not join her, to some degree, in her intense drinking habits. She admits that, when sober, she cannot communicate effectively, feels painfully shy, and cannot bring herself to express her feelings for those around her. At one point she speaks of not doing drugs, yet is constantly referring to sharing joints with friends. Does she somehow not consider marijuana a drug?

The book is apparently intended to be one horror scene after another: having to be taken to the hospital for alcohol poisioning at 16; numerous blackouts; waking to find herself naked in a stranger's bed, unsure if she has been date-raped; breaking into frat houses to go on stealing sprees; etc. For some reason, though, I found myself generally unaffected by these descriptions. Perhaps the writing is too matter-of-fact and so did not create feelings of sympathy or maybe there were just so many examples that they lose their impact. Maybe it is just that so much that happens really isn't that bad --- her purse is stolen while in Cancun, but she still has her passport and her parents fly her home, no problem. By the time she does get around to a truly horrible experience, she seems to gloss over it so quickly that there is no impact. What I did find disturbing, truth be told, were the bits of research she includes throughout the book such as quotes from studies on alcohol abuse. For some reason, these sterlie numbers struck me deeply more than her personal account.

Would I recommend this book? Hard to say. It is long -- longer than need be, I think, and the shock effect wasn't there for me. Maybe it would have more of an impact on someone younger. I could see it being useful for anyone writing a paper on underage drinking, or someone who has a definite interest. Parents, too, may want to read it to try and learn some of the signs to watch out for in their children.

Arrived safely today. Stamp says arrived on Valentines, 14th of Feb, but it was in the mailbox today.


Thx!