LOVE bade me welcome; yet my soul drew back,
Guilty of dust and sin.
But quick-eyed Love, observing me grow slack
From my first entrance in,
Drew nearer to me, sweetly questioning
If I lack'd anything.

'A guest,' I answer'd, 'worthy to be here:'
Love said, 'You shall be he.'
'I, the unkind, ungrateful? Ah, my dear,
I cannot look on Thee.'
Love took my hand and smiling did reply,
'Who made the eyes but I?'

'Truth, Lord; but I have marr'd them: let my shame
Go where it doth deserve.'
'And know you not,' says Love, 'Who bore the blame?'
'My dear, then I will serve.'
'You must sit down,' says Love, 'and taste my meat.'
So I did sit and eat.

George Herbert

After reading this poem by 17th Century English poet George Herbert, Simone Weil, a secular philosopher who was raised agnostic, felt converted to Christianity in her heart. She had been coming to terms with Christianity before that and was a committed humanitarian. Her brief life was full of sacrifice for others before and after her conversion. This is her spiritual biography.

I was reading this book not so long ago during a time of grief and chaos. I set it aside and could not find it. Now it is back in my hands. Weil was a contemporary of the American writer M.F.K. Fisher who wrote of her formative time in France. I just finished reading one of her books. This seems like the answer to Fisher's poetic worldliness. I am ready to absorb this story now.

This poor vessel of Simone Weil, printed in 1973, is falling apart. I suppose I have had it for years and kept it for a re-read. I had to stop and re-glue the pages to the paper spine at about page 100 toward the end of Weil's final letter to poor Fr. Perrin. This was a good distraction as Weil annoyed me greatly here. I understand how she led Flannery O'Connor to create the famously frustrating characters Hulga, who gives her artificial leg to a Bible salesman she is attempting to seduce, and Hazel Motes, the evangelist of the church of no church. In the letters to Fr. Perrin section, she reminded me of another Jewish philosopher, Gillian Rose, who like Weil greatly admired Pascal's Pensées and Plato. Rose was also from a non-practicing Jewish household and her scholarship led her to an engagement with Christianity. I read her book Love's Work a long time ago. She was more mature than Weil and was able to have a death-bed conversion to Christianity. I released a copy of Love's Work in bookcrossing:

Love's Work: A Reckoning with Life

http://www.bookcrossing.com/journal/6243133

Weil's thought is so elegant and I know she was sincere in her sacrifices. It is such a shame that her life ended early. I wish she could have felt its value more and have tended to it better. That said, her approach to death is not unfamiliar in the tradition of womanly Christian mysticism. She reminds me a bit of Julian of Norwich, who had an engagement with death at the age of 33 and wrote about what she learned from that for the rest of her life. If only there'd been more time for Weil. Still with St. Julian, for her soul I pray "...and all things will be well...and all manner of things will be well."

My engagement with this book makes me incapable of giving it a balanced rating. For Weil's passionate writing and elegant thought, I give it a 10.

This will be released into a safe place in the wild where someone interested might find it. The book is frail from all of its years of earthly life so I am not going to mail it. Fortunately, for those who feel the need to read this, there is a reissue. I found it registered in bookcrossing:

http://www.bookcrossing.com/journal/1965088/

I am going to release this sampler of Julian of Norwich to accompany this.

Hello! You are invited to join the story of this book through bookcrossing, a random community of book lovers. We profess book serendipity and have many testimonies from finders of our books to prove that there is such a thing. If you make a journal entry at our site with the BCID (bookcrossing ID) on the bookplate all previous owners of this book will see where it has landed and where it goes after you release it. Bookcrossing is free to join and confidential. You are invited to enjoy this book and if you like to become a part of its story in bookcrossing.

This book traveled away from the place where I left it. I hope it was a wonderful discovery for a reader.